Talking Back: The Reason Why It Happens and What You Can Do About It

Untitled design 11 - Talking Back: The Reason Why It Happens and What You Can Do About It

It is more common than you may think, children aged 6 to 8 tend to talk-back when asked to do something they don’t like. This usually happens in order to get the parent’s attention and to test the limits of things they can get away with. The reason why it happens and what you can about it is discussed in this blog.

ALSO, READ Preteen Distress: Help Your Child to Overcome It

Talking Back: Bad Behavior

When a child talks back and retorts with a sentence that is least expected may throw the parents or the elders’ off-guard. This is considered bad behavior and for good reasons. Children should not be allowed to talk back with their elders out of respect.

Reason why it happens

Your child is in need of your attention. What parents need to understand is that when a child talks back, he/she is doing it out of fear, anger, hurt or frustration. The reasons are basic child need and simple. If you have recently had a new baby, chances are that your older child is feeling ignored and less-loved. These reactions are very common and apply to children of all ages.

Another reason could be a change in your work schedule that has shorten your time with your child. This also makes your child feel neglected. All these feelings pile up and you end up hearing your child talking back.

How to prevent it

As a parent, you first need to understand why your child get frustrated? If you ask your child to clean up the mess he/she has created when your child is in the middle of something, the chances of him/her answering you back are high. Give a time frame of 5 to 10 minutes before you absolutely have to nag your child.

Secondly, set limitations to the tone and the choice of words your child can actually use. Make sure that your child knows what is allowed and what is not. Correct any behavior problems that you notice your child display so it does not get repeated again.

Finally, understand that when a child talks back, he/she is expressing emotions and feelings. Let your child know gently that you care about the feelings and understand them whole-heartedly. Skipping this step and going directly over to disciplining will only lead to future episodes of back-talk.


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