It is very common and normal for the parents to feel shocked, grief, anger, guilt and a sense of failure when a pregnancy is lost. The mother may even feel vulnerable at the hands of nature where she cannot do anything to save her child. Coping with pregnancy loss is not easy.
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The few days, in the beginning, will feel incredibly difficult and painful following a pregnancy loss, especially if you planned the pregnancy carefully or if this wasn’t the first loss you have had to face. If you had already announced your pregnancy to family and friends, you also have to deal with the difficulty of having to announce that the baby is no more with you.
Here are a few things that will help you get through the difficult time.
Forgive Yourself – It Was Not Your Fault
Remember that a pregnancy loss can happen to anyone. There is no right or wrong on how a partner may respond to the reactions. Accept your feelings and the feelings of your partner. Talk and discuss your feelings with your spouse and avoid judging each other. Neither the wife nor the husband at to be blamed.
Time Heals All Wounds
Do not put yourself under the pressure to speed up the process of healing. Deal with the grief of loss as it comes so you are ready to accept and completely get over the feelings of sadness. You may feel new waves of depression around your due date and other milestones but with time it will all pass.
Take Time off from Work
You may feel physically fine but psychologically, you need time to heal. Taking time off from your regular routine will help you acknowledge what has happened and accept what you are going through. The time away from the regular life will help to cope with pregnancy loss easier.
Accept that Everyone Deals with Grief in Different Ways
Do not judge your spouse if he does not grieve the same way you are. Understand that men and women deal with loss in different ways. The husband would usually keep the feelings to himself and maintain a strong exterior in order to give his family support, but this does not mean that he isn’t upset.
Look for support from friends and family. It is not necessary that everyone will understand your sadness, but someone will. Get in touch with other mothers who have had to experience a loss of pregnancy and ask them how they dealt with the pain.